PFunk's Travels

With my travels having taken me the last two weekends to Austin to compete in over 12 hours of racing, I feel like I should have something bigger to do this weekend. Alas, my next event isn't until January, the Houston Marathon. Here are some thoughts on my latest adventures though...

The fact that I am alive is good. Check off priority Number #1 on the list.

The fact that the day after the 70.3 race I went online to see when the next available race at that distance is, is scary.

Equally scary, is me shaving my legs for the race.

The 70.3 was a perfect distance. It is definitely not something to just sign up for on a whim, but with training, a great feat. The day before the race I was at a sports bar and told a guy about the race I was doing and the distances involved. You could see in his eyes his brain doing math, computing what he had just heard and translating it into how long that would actually take. His response came with slight bewildered, "Man, I think I am just going to grill and watch the Cowboys game tomorrow." We had different Sundays.

There is now a strange calm I have about the Ironman. The distances, the times, they don't scare me as they once did. I know one thing about the Ironman I didn't before, I need to go faster. The longer you are out there, the more slowly you break.

Adventure races are not what I thought they were. I thought there were more activities to do involving my skills. Nunchaku skills, bow hunting skills, computer hacking skills... In this adventure race it was basically location hunting by means of running, biking and roller blading/scootering, though one part you did kayak.

I really did my best to put the economy back on track this week. The race required a number of items I did not have. I bought roller blades, rather mountain skates that are on and off road capable, a full set of pads, (the mountain skates do not have any kind of brake on them), and a scooter capable of "scooting" without having to push off the ground with your foot.

Katherine did an amazing job filling in on team Rad Racing with tax man Jeff ("Hollywood" Mike Miranda) bailing the week before we went to Helltrack. And D (Cru Jones) did a good job of costing us the race well within the first hour, biking ahead after completing our second task, getting lost, and not making it back to transition for a good 20 minutes.

Is it still considered last place if you were the last team to finish the race, without getting scratched from the course? If so, put us down for that one. Here are the results.

There were two really interesting tasks in the Oyster Race. One task your team had to locate a specific building and get to the 19 floor. When we found the building, you could only use the stairwell. In another task you had to get to this frisbee disc course, by means of roller blades/scooter/skateboard and play hole 17 or 18 and complete the hole in under four shots/throws. If after two attempts your team failed to received a four or less, the representative would punch your passport and you could continue to your next challenge. Here's the trick, this task is one that is not skill related, but strategy related. I just wanted to play frisbee golf, I'll let you figure it out.

 

The Ultimate Urban Adventure Race

I love doing races. Mainly, races I have never done before and particularly different types of races. I had never known the world of adventure racing until D sent me a link and said we should do this... The Oyster.

6 hours, 3 minutes and 44 seconds later, and after I had eaten an oyster on Passport #8...

Katie, our supreme support person and only clue we had as to which way to go in a city none of us knew, we couldn't have done it without you.

My First 70.2?

From the Race Director:

"We recognize that the swim was short. Unfortunately, due to the heavy wind gusts, some of the buoys moved after they were checked on race morning, about 20 minutes before the swim start. We didn't realize it until looking at the results. We wish we could control everything, but Mother Nature has the final say."

My First 70.3

I had swam the 1.2, biked the 56 miles and neared mile marker 10. Still ahead loomed round 2 with QUADZILLA. My watch read 5:31:30. The prospect of 'just finishing' faded. It became clear then that I had to break 6 hours. Possibly, my finest 3 miles ever.

Saturday

As with any story, I should start at the beginning.

Saturday my left knee felt the blade of a razor for the second time this year. The first time was in January and I was on a gurney. This time I was in the shower with a Gillette Venus 3. With the information you now know, I will make this point; self checkout registers are great, not just for lines.

I now am waiting for the hair on my arms and legs to grow back. I read in a blog, if you hadn't swam with your arms and legs shaved you should do it at least once. Also, bikers are known to shave their legs. While faster racers might argue wind resistance, the real concern is in the event of a crash.

So, I have silky smooth arms and legs.

Tough Just Getting To The Line

It is the weekend of the race. I can't wait to race, but this is the most I have thought about a race before and it becomes mostly negative the longer it continues. This race's association with the Ironman just means more to me, because it is an official 70.3. I also know that I need to cross this finish line and then want to line up at the starting line and do it again, but not this Sunday.

I haven't trained near what I need to; though that is what I feel the least concerned about. Both my runs this week have felt alarming. Every muscle and ligament feels like it is sending a slight signal, vying for my attention, to stay inspective of it. This is a particularly bad feeling having had surgery within the year. I have been doing a lot of stretching to try and help this. A number of people in my office are sick. I can't explain how much I have just wanted to be in a bubble unharmed for the week. I was even hesitant to play certain sports and risk getting hurt. I can't stand the idea of 'playing not to get injured' and being reluctant on a play.

With triathlons, there is a lot of do before a race, a lot to set up with your bike and transition area. It is very different than a marathon, just lacing up some sneakers the morning of and showing up at the starting line. I think I will feel more prepared when I am in Austin and have my stuff set up. Or, I will feel more scared, lye awake Saturday night tucked tight in a ball, cry myself to sleep and stand at the starting line nervous and wet myself.

It would make sense why they call them 'wetsuits.' Though, it would also make sense that they call them wetsuits because you use wear them in water.

The Deal

Here is the deal. I think a lot of people don't know the different distances and names of races in the world of triathlons. Similarly, a great track runner could tell someone they are going to compete in the steeplechase and one might think, "Golly, this equestrian I am talking to must be an accomplished rider."

Someone asked me if I was doing a "mini-triathlon" this weekend. Mini? Kind of.

Names of races don't really correlate with distances to those that really don't compete. When I was raising money last year for Team In Training and competing in my first triathlon, an Olympic distance, people would say I was doing an Ironman. It is probably the first thing that comes to mind with the word triathlon, but the difference is a great distance.

On Sunday, I will compete in a half-Ironman, referred to as a long course or 70.3. It is a 1.2 mile swim, 56 mile bike, and 13.1 mile run. Total miles = 70.3. There are cut off time limits within each event and you have to finish the entire race within 8 hours.

Ready... Set... Wait? How far is this again?

Raw Talent

I remember that one fateful day when Coach took me aside. I knew what was coming. "You don't have to tell me," I said. "I'm off the team, aren't I?" "Well," said Coach, "you never were really ON the team. You made that uniform you're wearing out of rags and towels, and your helmet is a toy space helmet. You show up at practice and then either steal the ball and make us chase you to get it back, or you try to tackle people at inappropriate times." It was all true what he was saying. And yet, I thought something is brewing inside the head of this Coach. He sees something in me, some kind of raw talent that he can mold. But that's when I felt the handcuffs go on.

A Deep Thought by Jack Handey

Gear

Today, I bought the shoes I am going to run the Houston Marathon in.

Really the only two things I, and you, need to know about these racers is that I purchased them for $30 and on the bottom, in print you have to search to find, inscribed is "LICKETY SPLIT!"

But What Am I Going To Wear?

With less than 9 days until the race, I realize, I need a uniform. I have my TEAM tri uni, but in the Ironmans I am not racing with TNT.

I can swim, bike, and run all I want, but it means nothing if you don't look good doing it.

I need a headband that lets people know as I pass them to perhaps be aware of a karate chop, and I need spandex for speed and agility, and I need neon.

Faded denim never looked so good crossing the finish line.

I need to do all Ironman races in vintage Agassi wear. eBay Agassi Challenge Court searchers beware, there is a new sniper online.

Pre Lives

I recently bought an old school track jacket, written on the back is "Pre Lives."

Steve Prefontaine was a crazy runner with a great 'stache who said, "To give anything less than your best is to sacrifice the Gift." Here is the only thing you really need to know about Pre from Wikipedia:

Prefontaine was an aggressive runner, insisting on going out hard and not relinquishing leads, a tactic that his fans and fellow competitors admired. He was quoted as saying, "No one will ever win a 5,000 meter by running an easy two miles. Not against me." He would later state, "I am going to work so that it's a pure guts race. In the end, if it is, I'm the only one that can win it."

It is sad when greats die young, though as the jacket says, "Pre Lives."

Breakfast of Champions

Breakfast is the most important meal of the day. With a half-Ironman race a little over two weeks away, and a distance that is farther than any other I have completed to date, this feels like what I should be eating.

It is a familiar feeling, I feel unprepared. Nails for breakfast seems like the only thing that might toughen me up in the little time I have before I stand in the water with hundreds others. Though it is fun for me, because I haven't done this distance before, and ultimately when I am done honing the weapon, this distance will seem short of a warm up.

Still, I feel unprepared because I haven't trained in the distances I should have, with the disciplines together as they will be on race day, because I could get pulled off the course for not making a time cut, and I might be a little concerned one of these distances is too much.

I've heard 50% of training is getting on the starting line healthy. I'm just unsure which 50% this breakfast is going to help.

Run Humans Run

One of the coolest races I have ever participated in was the one in which I saw only one other runner on the course. The course, planet earth.

The Nike+ Human Race 10K was billed as the day the world stopped to run. The race had 25 official races around the world. And, you could participate anywhere in the world with Nike+. Of course I had all the gear, my Nike+ shoes, SportBand (the most ingenious invention, but that doesn't work - reviews don't lie), and official race jersey. (Again, ingenious. Each shirt is personalized with an individualized bib number.)

I ran the race early in the morning in the hills of the Rocky Mountains. I didn't expect to see anyone but was having a good time in my official race jersey knowing, the world out there, others were running too. Then, about 30 minutes in a girl passed me in the opposite direction listening to an iPod in her official race jersey. We both smiled and I'm pretty sure I started running faster. I think I beat her.

Proof positive that the SportBand doesn't work: I don't remember that gravitation pull my pace line is experiencing in my uploaded run. It also recorded my time at 56'02" HA, what a faulty piece of equipment, wait, what?, that was my actual time, probably still is broken though.

 

The worst part about having a microchip record your race distance? Oh I guess coming up .01K short of the actual imaginary Nike+ Human Race 10K finish line.

Longing for Season 5?

One thing I find interesting is thinking about everyone you know and then imagining everyone on a island. Who would love the setting, survive and flourish, who would hate the situation, act irrational, and self destruct. The most intriguing piece about this scenario is that some would do well based on their mental capacities, others drawn from experiences, and some just on physical strength. I imagine this and think about the Ironman, because an Ironman race would claim anyone who didn't excel in all three.

Distance - My Benzoylmethyl Ecgonin

I think, for me, I love to race not for the competition, but for my body. We have all been given a very sharp, intelligent instrument and it is interesting to see others and how they choose to use it. I think that is part of the fun of watching the Olympics, because you get to witness a human machine trained to do a specific task better than anyone else in the world. A gold medal means out of 6.692 billion people, you are the best of all.

One thing I find curious about myself, and am finding out now, is I don't think racing a previous distance is exciting. I am training for my 3rd marathon, I am a bit bored, though not because I find the challenge easy. I will run the 26.2 miles and hopefully, as is the goal with every race I enter, I will finish. I haven't finished either marathon in less than 4 hours. It is a goal this time around, but really, I just find myself wondering how much farther I could go, if any. Time and PRs seem like footnotes.

The prospect that only distance is consequential to me is a bit frightening. I pretty much want to do as many races as I can and I currently only want to know the title of "Ironman," though what if I do finish? The idea that I would want to do more is sickening, even to me. I can't imagine it now, and in less than 30 days I will get a good taste of half.